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Looking in the mirror

Part 1

So, Matt steps up to the stage. I already know that he's going to be talking about the shepherd and his unregenerate sheep. I've watched the videos that talked about why Piper chose him to come. I know where I think this talk is going. Basically, he's there to answer the question what do you do about all those around you who say they're sheep, but don't act like it? We've all got those people in our lives down here in Texas. Almost everyone you know goes to one church or another. Or at least they say they do.

I went to jr. high and high school in a town with less than a thousand people in it. But still, there were six churches in town. You could find five more just by driving a few miles down the highway. Most Sundays all across Texas and the rest of the south the churches are filled with people. There may only be 14 people there, but that's because it's in the middle of no where, west Texas. There may be only five houses within 15 miles of it! But they're there...Sunday morning, Sunday evening, Wednesday nights...and if you're really religious, you're there for the business meeting before the service starts.

Down here, almost everyone in the stands on a Friday night would say they were a Christian. Truly. They might be able to name one or two people they know that "don't go to church"...and they'd be able to talk about that strange, white building that went up next to the jr. high. But not them...and not their friends. They're Christians. Unfortunately, too many of those claims for Christianity come from those that are basing it on what happened one summer at VBS or on the fact that their daddy was a deacon and their family has sat on the same pew at church since their great-granddaddy helped build it...see that plaque on the side? Going to church here is simply...what you do.

I heard Don Carson last night say...

The rising secularization...does not mean the diminishing of religion...secularization does not shut down religion. What it does is shift it to the periphery of life so that you can be ever so religious as long as it doesn't matter...so long as it's a just private thing...so that if anybody wants to say that their religion ought to change how people think and act and live, what laws should be passed and the like...No! No! No! You mustn't do that!

This is an attitude Matt Chandler knows too well in the Dallas area. He starts with the story of how he got to where he is at The Village. A funny, sad, angry story. At the end of it he says...

In December of 2002, despite my anger towards evangelicals, I became the pastor of a church of evangelicals in what Christianity Today called the “center of the evangelical world.” Despite the fact that my heart had always burned for the prodigal, God sent me to the older brother.

A little pang there. Isn't that true? Too often I'm just like the older brother in that story, wanting to know where my piece of the pie is. Not concerned, not burning with desire for the lost. Just sitting back at home, feeling proud of myself for keeping the faith, wanting my goat to throw a party for my friends. Yeah. Little pain there. I needed that.

But...onto those sheep...what about them? I'm ready. What's he going to tell us to do? How do you talk to them? How can I break through to those around me? How do you convince someone that they're not a believer when they think they are? Should you even try? I wait pen in hand for him to get started.

He tells us he's going to 1 Timothy 4. Really? I'm thinking. I start reviewing what I know of that chapter...don't let anyone think less of you because you're young...set an example...keep a close watch...on yourself. Uh-oh. I don't like where this is going. Yeah. I was right. I didn't like where he was going. But it's good.

Giggling in the dark

I mentioned that I was recovering from surgery. My Mom informed me not to do this without being abundantly clear that I was talking about "spiritual" surgery and not in a hospital somewhere, lying in a bed, unable to CALL YOUR MOTHER!! Yep. We moms can get a little emotional over our little ones...even when the little one is 40 years old.

So, no...to clear up any confusion. I'm not recovering from any cutting on my body. But I am healing from some good surgery God did on my soul to sever some more flesh from the spirit he's sanctifying in me. And He got started while I was watching this talk from Matt Chandler. Before I post about his talk, let me tell you why all my girls were excited he had been asked to the conference.


Matt (May I call you Matt? Thanks.) has been used by God in an amazing way here in the Ransleben household. Brennan listens to him almost nightly. This came after months of trying to figure out how to settle her mind on truth as she lay in bed night after night, filled with anxiety...from what? You'll have to name it...because mostly she can't. Maybe it's something coming the next day. Maybe it's something happening 6 months from now. Maybe it's something that may never happen. But somewhere in that darkened room her fears would rise and her mind would race and the tears would fall. Night after night.

Then one night last summer, I was sleeping next to her in a hotel room and wasn't tired though I knew we had to turn the lights out for the girls. Don't you hate that moment? Well, I had come prepared with my iPod loaded with sermons. As we lay together in the dark, it was obvious she wasn't able to settle. We talked for a while about what might be concerning her...talked again about trusting the Lord...about talking to Him. I asked if she might like to listen to this guy I was listening to. He's pretty funny and was speaking about his kids which I thought she might like.

She pretty reluctantly agreed but soon started smiling along with me as we lay with our faces near each other, holding on to each other in the darkened room. Then giggles from her which, of course, caused her sisters to rise up to see what's going on. That made her relax even more. Mom and she shared a secret. Giggle, giggle. Her whole body sank into sleep as she listened because though Matt starts funny, interesting and even sarcastic and self-depreciating, it's not long before the truth of what he's saying penetrates deeply to the root of where I am turning from God. If you're like us, your body and mind quiet while the truth of God settles inside.

He's passionate about the Lord. His theology matches mine. His sarcasm makes me look kind. And his stories show that truth matters in real life. My kind of preacher.

Since that night, Brennan has gone to bed with earphones plugged in. She listens to the sermon from that first night over and over. She can literally quote most of it. But now she's heard almost everything he's ever said. She brings up the sermons when talking about life. She remembers them when she reads the Word. She tells me his points as well as her favorite lines as we drive together. But more than that, being under the Word through his teaching has settled the nights for her. As she listens, her mind shuts out the fears and fills with the Word. How grateful do you think I am for the gift of Matt Chandler to the church?

If you'd like to give him a listen click the link to the right under "Favorite People To Listen To". Brennan's favorite one is from 6.01.08 called "From Childish to Childlike". And when you get to the line, "That's old school, baby!"...think of her! That starts her laughing every time.

Another must hear is the series called The Cross (Parts 1-6). This was given between March and April of 2007. I can't recommend it strongly enough. I told this to Cassie shortly after Brennan began listening daily. She, I'm sure, thought like she always did when I tell her she's got to read this, listen to this, see this...Sure, Mom...whatever. I say it a lot. But she downloaded it to take on the Ukraine trip last summer with Wayne. She told me she thought she'd listen to them like Brennan does to go to sleep. Funny.

She griped at me when she got back for two reasons. First, she never got to sleep. How could I when they were so amazing?? And second, why didn't you tell me how great they were??? Everyone should listen to this!! I just said I was sorry. What can you do?

As I read back over this, you might get the impression that he's just a really good sleep aid! Promise that's not true. Even when Brennan does go to sleep during one, she immediately goes back to the last thing she remembers and starts from there. You won't want to miss anything he's teaching.

So, even though he is generally used to flay me open, I'm grateful...oh, so grateful...for the gift of teaching through Matt. Take a listen sometime and let me know if you agree. Tomorrow I'll let you know what I learned from 1 Timothy 4.

Wedding cake #1

And hopefully the last. I'm not cut out for the pressure of a bride on her wedding day. Fortunately, she was happy with it. So for all of you who care...though why you would other than to have a chuckle, I'll never know...

Let's work on our parking, shall we?

I know. I'm encouraging demeaning stereotypes. But given that I've driven with a lot of my friends...yes, you...there's a reason these things become well known. Here's just a few examples of why it's important to me to teach my girls how to drive well.

Heads up

Sometimes I think of things that I wish I had known as a young mom. This is one of them, though it falls on the lighter side of parenting. And yes, I know that I mentioned it here before, but it bears repeating...

Be careful about doing things two times in a row for your kids, especially on holidays.

Anything two times in a row.

Sometimes you'll mean to. You've got something that you're longing to impart to them so you start doing something special around Christmas or their birthday. I promise that if you do, it's stuck. It doesn't take much. But sometimes, you won't mean to. You won't even remember what you did last year. But they will.

That's why tonight the girls are getting helium balloons and chocolate for Valentine's Day. Not because there was some grand plan to teach them something profound about love...but because one night at about 11pm on the day before Valentine's, Wayne and I remember that we had NOTHING to give the girls the next morning. Thus a trip to Wal-Mart's decimated aisles where we got the only things left...balloons and chocolate. They loved it so much that we remembered the balloons the next year. And who doesn't do chocolate. But that was years ago. You'd think they'd clamor for something better now. But no. Last week I overheard them talking to each other.

Can't wait to get my balloon, said Brennan.
And chocolate, said Aisley.
Yeah and remember we get a gift card, too, Brennan added.

A gift card? When did I throw that in? I ask.
Mom. Seriously. I hear back. You always get us a gift card.
Mom, the other adds, you know that. She's just being funny.

Well, no. I wasn't. But thinking back...sure enough...for the last couple of years we've gotten them various gift cards because frankly I'm tired of the junk that accumulates in my house and at least Chik-fil-a is consumable. Also, that's the only way they'd ever get Starbucks from me because there is something about paying $4 for a drink that rubs me wrong!

So there you have it. Balloons, chocolate and gift cards. Now the trick is to figure out some amazingly deep spiritual analogy that will make them think of Christ instead of consumerism and modern day romance. Any ideas, let me know. For now, I better start thinking about what we did for Easter the last couple of years...

Real Life Valentine

There's nothing we women love more than a good love story. Sly glances, soft touches, the right words at the right time that tell you that he alone sees you as you really are...and that what you really are is all he's ever wanted. With a household of girls, there's a lot of sighing when Mr. Darcy walks toward Lizzy in the morning mist and says that if she speaks his love will forever be silenced...sigh...

But at 40 I find myself growing less enamored with love at its beginnings than in love that endures. Almost everyone finds the first...fewer than ever, it seems, find that which lasts to the end. Love that has met and faced, fought and striven, lingered and overcome. Love that has wounded and healed, worked and failed, stroked and soothed.

In August of this year, Wayne and I will have been married 20 years so that explains a lot of it. As sizes expand and blood pressures rise...as gray hair increases and winkles appear...confidence of that which once attracted wanes, but what remains is invaluable to me. I was reminded of this today when I read a posting entitled Love in the Time of Prostate Cancer. It's written by a man who's undergoing treatment for prostate cancer. In it he writes of his discovery of this very thing. It really resonated with me. (Note, moms, that it contains things which I wouldn't have Aisley and Brennan read yet.)

And since this is the day before Valentine's, let me just say here how grateful I am to love Wayne. He has endured with me patiently. He has cared for me tenderly. He has argued with me lovingly. He has corrected me gently. He has seen me through sick months and played with me through sunny days. The gift of him to me softened my heart to love my Father more. I could never tell you why Wayne looked at me that night and asked me to dance. But I know why I held on so tight. The joy in my heart today is that I still love to be in his arms everyday.

I love you, honey. Happy Valentine's Day.

Okay, okay

I know that I really need to get better at posting while pondering. But I find I have almost nothing to say during those times. And I'm finally old enough to know that nothing said is far better than something said too soon. I'll try to get better at pointing you to where I am, so maybe I won't be alone in what I'm thinking...though when you read what it's like for me, you may take a pass!

I've had a busy week, but that's not really keeping me from computer time. Mostly I've been watching some amazing talks from last week's Desiring God Pastor's Conference. If you've not seen any of them, please don't miss the talks from Matt Chandler and Michael Oh. I love Mark Dever and am so grateful for his work during this conference, especially the first talk on the gospel itself. If I could get my Impact kids to see this before we begin next month's training, we'd be ready to hit the ground running. But Mark and Michael cut me to the bone...layed me out...then stitched me up again to send me on my way to healing. I'm so grateful.

I've also been working through When I Don't Desire God... Set-Apart Feminity... Valley of Vision...and studying hard on God's Sovereignty in all our lives through all of Scripture.

So, I'll post on how the surgery recovery is going when I can breathe again...and when the wedding cake is finished. Yes. A wedding cake. Have I ever made a wedding cake? No. Am I excited? Well...excited might be going a little far (right, Mom?). But I am grateful...truly. When the Lord gives you something to do, being happy about it can be a fight...but it's a fight that must be won. He's much more glorified when we look pleased with Him than when we look like this life in Christ is a begrudging, joyless trial that keeps us from doing what we really want to do. Pray for me to have this lived as truth.

On that note, let me leave you with this quote that I read today from the ladies at Titus 2 Talk. They are a group of Christian ladies out of the UK and while they don't post often, when they do, it's gems like this one. Join me in thanking God for Mrs. Spurgeon and her call out to us all...

When my soul is tossed on the rough waves of the troubled sea of this life, if I can but cast out the anchor of hope into the depths of God's blessed will, it holds fast at once and the winds and the waves are rebuked...

God's plans and purposes for me, and for you, dear reader, were all made and determined on from the beginning; and as they are worked out day by day in our lives, how wise should we be if, with joyful certainty, we accepted each unfolding of his will as a proof of his faithfulness and love! When once I, as a believer, can say from my heart, 'This is the will of God concerning me', it matters not what the 'this' is - whether it be a small domestic worry, or the severance of the dearest earthly ties - the fact that it is his most blessed will, takes all the fierce sting out of the trouble, and leaves it powerless to hurt or hinder the peace of my soul.

~ Susannah Spurgeon in Free Grace and Dying Love

Dr. Don

There is so much that this present generation of teens and twenty somethings will never understand...

• Why we would have ever had to call when we got somewhere.
• How to reheat without a microwave.
• Having to get up to change the channel.
• Have to flip through all four stations.
• Knowing that if the Indian Chief is on the TV, and I'm hearing the National Anthem then it's time for everyone to be in bed.
• Never having a need for a password.
• Why we all sniffed our tests with the weird purple ink.
• What it was like to spend the car rides climbing all over the car and playing in the floorboard! Eeek.
  

One of those is how precious this announcement is. When God called me out of my pointless life and into life with Him, there was no internet...no iTunes...no way to hear from great men of God unless you spent lots of time reading and reading and reading. Good thing for me that I love to read! But today's generation of Christians have amazing access to teaching that so reveals Christ that we behold Him and are transformed.

Dr. Don Carson is one of those men. If you've never heard of him, I'm so grateful to introduce him. And if you have, then you'll know why I'm so thrilled that the Gospel Coalition is hosting a resource page that includes more than 400 talks he's given over the years. Topics include the Bible, marriage, culture, giving, the sovereignty of God...it goes on and on. There's also a listing of his books, his biography and other publications.

Take some time to download a few of these and give them a listen as you chop veggies, wait in the carpool line, take a walk or sit at the doctor's office. You will be so blessed.

Leader of the Free World

I've seen many posts this morning that talk about the struggle we all feel as Christians when considering our momentous day yesterday. But this one by Thabiti Anyabwile helps me to see it in a wonderful way. If you don't know him, you need to. Click his name to get to his blog.

Thabiti Anyabwile

I am rejoicing this morning more than I was for my friends who like him woke to a day that others said may come, woke to a day where the promise of America is as true for them as for my girls...and woke to a day where the one who stepped into that role is one who is opposed to so much that they live for in Christ. "God help us, please help us."

Leader of the Free World

Woke up this morning
and the leader of the free world
was a black man.

Woke up this morning,
got myself dressed,
and marveled at what's happened in this land.

Brushed my teeth in the mirror,
smiled at a face made silly with tooth paste.

No more black face comedy,
there's a black man in the White House,
and so much of the world is subject to his tastes.

What will it mean,
to now be a black man in the free world?

Will anything change,
will everything change,
a million ideas in my mind all in a swirl.

I don't even write poetry.
But I woke up this morning
and a black man was the leader of the free world.

Prose won't do it for me,
describe this ended longing.
Can you believe an African-American leads the free world,
with a beautiful brown wife and two little girls?

My country tis of thee,
sweet land of liberty,
land where my fathers died,
land where black mothers cried,
land where we were so long denied,
on every mountainside,
freedom rings.

Barack Hussein Obama,
son of a black man and a white mama,
now leads the free world.

Heaven knows the plot twists of this drama.
God help us, please help us.
Protect every unborn boy and girl.

Can't wink at some things,
even as the joy is irrepressible.
The confluence of emotions are inexpressible.

Gil Scott Heron had it wrong:
The revolution has been televised, has been televised, has been televised.
And a black man is the leader of the free world!

I never believed my mama,
when she said I could be anything, even president.
But now the White House has a new resident,
Barack Hussein Obama.

Goes to show what I know.
On a cold January day, my mama was proved a prophet.
In God's economy, nothing could stop it.
And this morning, a black man is the leader of the free world.

Through me

We know Jesus has remembered us through you.

The words were spoken by a pastor in Uganda in response to a team from Covenant Life Church who went to spend a couple of weeks preaching and serving the people near a church they support.

I can picture the scene. Uganda differs some from Nigeria in topography, but not much in hope, so I can see the dirt and brush surrounding this small group of people who have been waiting on Jesus. I can see their eyes shining as they pray in Jesus Name. I can feel their hands that clasp so hard to show their gratitude. I can hear the sounds of hope that sprang up throughout the villages that the building where they would be taught about Jesus would finally be built. And I can see through it all their countenances changed because Jesus had remembered them.

Those words penetrated my heart today as I think of all those around us who are longing in their hearts to know...to really know...that Jesus remembers them in their poverty, pain and suffering... in their tiredness, discouragement and grief... in their loss, disease and brokenness.

We all have those moments when the promises of God are true...but far off, it seems. We believe in His love, provision and care...but how different to know...to really know. It changes everything, doesn't it? So, how is it that we know?

Sometimes, He's so gracious just to touch out hearts...that quiet moment when our hearts settle, our minds clear and all seems steady for a moment.

Sometimes, His Word opens before us and we see...truly see...this Word that is for us, that calls to us to remember who He is, what He has done and what He has committed to do because of His Son, Jesus Christ...and our eyes clear and we see Him and so are changed one degree.

But sometimes...sometimes...seeing, we do not see...hearing, we do not hear...and in those moments all seems dark. Who has heard us? Who will help? Does Jesus remember me?

Those words are our sounding call...our trumpet blast...our call to arms...our signal to go, go, go.
In those words are the starter's gunshot to have beautiful feet. Feet which go, support, preach, teach and tell. Feet which love, heal, help and bind up. Feet which hold, hug, feed and provide.

Feet that bring the message...The Lord has heard your cry and remembered you. I come in Jesus Name. I come because He came. He remembers and He cares and He has provided for you. Remember Him. Praise Him. Hold on to Him. His mercies are new. His promises are sure. Remember Him for He has remembered you.

Do you hear it? Isn't there one near you? One who's lost someone. One who's suffering. One who's sinking under despair. One who's gasping for a moment of peace. Isn't there one?

Isn't there one far from you but whose heart you can hear beating from here? One who stands on foreign soil, but whose pain is close to you. One who is surrounded by land you've never seen, but whose troubles have pierced your life as well. One who lives as you live, loves as you love, fears as you fear, longs as you long. Isn't there one?

Make my feet beautiful, Lord. Open my ears to hear the cry, the call to go, go, go. Give me eyes to see and the confidence to believe, to expect that I will be met with what I need to meet what I find. Make me over, Lord, into the likeness of Your Son whom You sent to gather those who would go. Remember me that I might remember you so that others might know that you remember them through me. In Jesus Name, Amen.

Hope

You got any tissues at hand? Get 'em.
Yeah. I know there are a couple of guys that read this that have already moved on without a though. Tears? Whatever.
Don't say you weren't warned.

There are some games in which cheering for the other side feels better than winning.

by Rick Reilly

They played the oddest game in high school football history last month down in Grapevine, Texas.

It was Grapevine Faith vs. Gainesville State School and everything about it was upside down. For instance, when Gainesville came out to take the field, the Faith fans made a 40-yard spirit line for them to run through.

Did you hear that? The other team's fans?

They even made a banner for players to crash through at the end. It said, "Go Tornadoes!" Which is also weird, because Faith is the Lions.

It was rivers running uphill and cats petting dogs. More than 200 Faith fans sat on the Gainesville side and kept cheering the Gainesville players on—by name.

"I never in my life thought I'd hear people cheering for us to hit their kids," recalls Gainesville's QB and middle linebacker, Isaiah. "I wouldn't expect another parent to tell somebody to hit their kids. But they wanted us to!"

And even though Faith walloped them 33-14, the Gainesville kids were so happy that after the game they gave head coach Mark Williams a sideline squirt-bottle shower like he'd just won state.

Gotta be the first Gatorade bath in history for an 0-9 coach.

But then you saw the 12 uniformed officers escorting the 14 Gainesville players off the field and two and two started to make four. They lined the players up in groups of five—handcuffs ready in their back pockets—and marched them to the team bus. That's because Gainesville is a maximum-security correctional facility 75 miles north of Dallas. Every game it plays is on the road.

This all started when Faith's head coach, Kris Hogan, wanted to do something kind for the Gainesville team. Faith had never played Gainesville, but he already knew the score. After all, Faith was 7-2 going into the game, Gainesville 0-8 with 2 TDs all year. Faith has 70 kids, 11 coaches, the latest equipment and involved parents. Gainesville has a lot of kids with convictions for drugs, assault and robbery—many of whose families had disowned them—wearing seven-year-old shoulder pads and ancient helmets.

So Hogan had this idea. What if half of our fans—for one night only—cheered for the other team? He sent out an email asking the Faithful to do just that. "Here's the message I want you to send:" Hogan wrote. "You are just as valuable as any other person on planet Earth."

Some people were naturally confused. One Faith player walked into Hogan's office and asked, "Coach, why are we doing this?"

And Hogan said, "Imagine if you didn't have a home life. Imagine if everybody had pretty much given up on you. Now imagine what it would mean for hundreds of people to suddenly believe in you."

Next thing you know, the Gainesville Tornadoes were turning around on their bench to see something they never had before. Hundreds of fans. And actual cheerleaders!

"I thought maybe they were confused," said Alex, a Gainesville lineman (only first names are released by the prison). "They started yelling 'DEE-fense!' when their team had the ball. I said, 'What? Why they cheerin' for us?'"

It was a strange experience for boys who most people cross the street to avoid. "We can tell people are a little afraid of us when we come to the games," says Gerald, a lineman who will wind up doing more than three years. "You can see it in their eyes. They're lookin' at us like we're criminals. But these people, they were yellin' for us! By our names!"

Maybe it figures that Gainesville played better than it had all season, scoring the game's last two touchdowns. Of course, this might be because Hogan put his third-string nose guard at safety and his third-string cornerback at defensive end. Still.

After the game, both teams gathered in the middle of the field to pray and that's when Isaiah surprised everybody by asking to lead. "We had no idea what the kid was going to say," remembers Coach Hogan. But Isaiah said this: "Lord, I don't know how this happened, so I don't know how to say thank You, but I never would've known there was so many people in the world that cared about us."

And it was a good thing everybody's heads were bowed because they might've seen Hogan wiping away tears.

As the Tornadoes walked back to their bus under guard, they each were handed a bag for the ride home—a burger, some fries, a soda, some candy, a Bible and an encouraging letter from a Faith player.

The Gainesville coach saw Hogan, grabbed him hard by the shoulders and said, "You'll never know what your people did for these kids tonight. You'll never, ever know."

And as the bus pulled away, all the Gainesville players crammed to one side and pressed their hands to the window, staring at these people they'd never met before, watching their waves and smiles disappearing into the night.

Anyway, with the economy six feet under and Christmas running on about three and a half reindeer, it's nice to know that one of the best presents you can give is still absolutely free.

Hope.

HT: My big brother!