Hopeful grieving

Cecelia's husband...

Barry's dad...
Barbara's mom...

All died this week.

Sandy's mom...
Andrea's baby...
Jenny's husband...

All grieved for this past weekend.

This was a hard week for so many who lost people they loved...especially if the loss was of a mom or of a child. It was also a hard week for those who sat and remembered those they loved whether they lost them in the past year or years and years ago. I know as you read this, you could add to the list above.

It was an especially hard day for Cecelia who buried her husband today. We grieve with her but not, as we were reminded at the funeral, as those who have no hope. We have hope because Charlie loved Jesus. We have hope because Cecelia loves Jesus. But most of all, we have hope because Jesus triumphed over death and his promises are sure. One day He will return for us. We will rise again. And one day, we will be with Him in glory. We won't cry anymore. We won't feel this shattering loss. We won't grab our hearts when the ache threatens to overwhelm.

But until that day, what can we do for those who feel their loss so keenly? The answer is simpler than we can imagine and harder to do than any of us would like to admit. We have to stay with them. Keep them in mind. Think about them. Imagine what it's like today to be where they are. What's so hard about that?

It's hard because part of our curse is that we don't sustain the right emotions for long. (Though I find it quite easy to sustain the wrong ones!) We want to love the LORD with all our heart, soul, mind and strength. We want to delight in Christ every day. We want to rejoice in the Lord always. We want to not be afraid, to be strong and courageous. And we make a start, don't we? But we can't hang on for long. We have to go again and again to God, depending on Him to finish in us what He Himself began. Looking again to Jesus, the Author and Perfecter of our faith, who did what we can't...stayed focused on God. We look only to His perfection and confess again and again our failure.

So, it's not really a surprise that often we don't comfort well. Paul wrote to us in 2 Corinthians 1 to remind us that the reason we ourselves have been comforted is for it to be passed along. In verses 3-6, he writes...

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God. For as we share abundantly in Christ’s sufferings, so through Christ we share abundantly in comfort too. If we are afflicted, it is for your comfort and salvation; and if we are comforted, it is for your comfort, which you experience when you patiently endure the same sufferings that we suffer.

If we've been through anything, it was to get us ready to comfort others. So, what's the down-to-earth way to do that? Well, a woman named Molly Piper is helping us all along. Just months ago, she lost her baby days before she was to give birth. She's written a series of posts that share with us all what we can do to help a grieving friend. Click the link above to see the first one. At the end of that, you'll see a list of writings on this subject that you can click on. I think that all of us who have walked this path would agree with what you'll see there.

Then get busy. Call someone and put into practice what you've read there. Make a meal. Write a card. Do something. Anything that let's them know they are not alone...that we, the body of Christ, see them. We stand with them. Their pain moves us. Like Jesus, we weep for no other reason than they are weeping.